Today’s Muse. Dog poop.

Today’s Muse. Dog poop.

It’s Labor Day. I should writing about that…

But less than 24 hours ago, dog poop took over my existence.

Mom and Dad were visiting. We were enjoying coffee outside on porch. Came time for them to leave…

(I so want to write a few other words defining a dog bowel movement, but I shall not in the interest of my most-of-the-time, family-friendly blogging integrity.)

Mistake # 1

 Early yesterday morning, I asked my daughter to walk the dog.

Mistake # 2

Dim lighting in old house that prohibits older parents from seeing massive pile of poop by the door as they walk to-and-fro loading (good word choice) up their car.

Mistake # 3

Not discovering poop tracked all over house before husband. My husband is a very patient man. Seems there is only one thing he can’t tolerate.

Mistake #4

Assuming there was only one pile. 

 (After the second load was discovered — only after it had been tracked all over house — I shoved everyone out the door to church. I said a quick prayer to my Lord and Savior asking His forgiveness and stayed home to clean.)

I lit 1000 Walmart candles. Stole a quick glance at the wine on the kitchen counter. Sigh. Made another pot of coffee. Pulled every cleaner out of the closet. Took a deep breath. Cleaned.

Mistake #5

Buying a house with 110-year-old heart pine floors. Seems soft dog poop wedges down deep in between the cracks of the amber boards as butter-cream frosting nestles down in layers of yellow cake.

Mistake #6

Massive media blitz December 2009 that convinced Santa to bring a puppy last Christmas…

No,  that should be Mistake #1.

And how was your Sunday morning?